Say something please?
Well you know how sometimes when the title of a post bears no relevance at all to the content? (An analogy would be to how the food picture on the store banner sometimes differs totally from the actual food)
Yea, this post is one such example. Blogging used to be IN me. The key word is not "in" but is actually "USED". Suddenly blogging is a chore. (Apologies to the still-avid bloggers, I really don't know of a better word to use). Many things are bound to change in this journey called life..
You know how people always say things like "I used to be so good at this.." or "Back in the days, I was addicted to this" blah blah blah... Well the thing is, there is a reason why Past Tense is being used. Simply put it, the past is gone, and the key is to keep moving forward. Yes. The past is often the best prevention for future mistakes, & often the hardest thing to look past. And for good reason too. Cause our past is essentially what makes us.
Take for example, a full grown adult who turned into a criminal or prisoner is possibly due to a poor up-bringing, coming from a broken family, or just belong to an unfortunate case of the inability to catch up in a merito-CRAZY country.
A rich and successful happy individual had probably grown up in a happy family .. With good parents doing all they can to ensure their child grows and develops to a good person.
Of cause, its not going to be always the case as exceptions/outliers are bound to exist. Moreover, who am I to judge what is happy and what is successful anyway? That itself could spark a decade-long debate.
In the life of b3n ... 28 years of living has too its fair share of ups and downs.
Honestly (and this is indeed a bitter pill to swallow), I often am delusional.
A delusion is a belief held with strong conviction despite superior evidence to the contrary (Courtesy of the ever-reliable google search)
I always held a strong belief that I am always right. When sometimes it becomes very apparent that evidence is pointing to the contrary. Am I forever 21? No. Am I really a high flyer in real life? No. Am I at least a firm decision maker, expected of a 28 year old male? No.
But then, if someone were to come to me now and ask if I am a good decision maker, I'd say yes.
If someone were to come to me now and ask if I am going to be a high flyer, I'd again say yes.
Pride/Confident or.. plain Naive/Delusional..
That being said, I might become a good decision maker. I might become a high flyer. It is after-all something I can work towards. (Keyword here is MIGHT) & optimism must come back to me.. I still want it to be my USP.
Y2014 is coming.. And I must make a difference this year. Enough of excuses, enough of delusions. Enough of "Potential". If I had any potiential in me at all, this year is going to be the year I show it. Y2013 was a huge year for me... Having done things and experiencing things I've never thought I'd imagined. To others, traveling overseas with your girlfriend, or supporting your girlfriend in a public performance might be minor. In my life, such are the things which makes me feel like I have a purpose. I have someone special worth living and fighting for. Whatever struggles which needs to be faced, whatever fears that needs to be overcomed... Everyone needs a certain motivation to press on... To continue moving forward... And I must have done a million good deeds in my previous life to have found that motivation.
I am not going to make my new year resolutions for this year public, but the people around me probably knows what kind of resolutions I would make anyway.
To all who came by and read through this post of mine...
Have a happy new year! Cheers and may your life be blessed tgt with your loved ones.
Yea, this post is one such example. Blogging used to be IN me. The key word is not "in" but is actually "USED". Suddenly blogging is a chore. (Apologies to the still-avid bloggers, I really don't know of a better word to use). Many things are bound to change in this journey called life..
You know how people always say things like "I used to be so good at this.." or "Back in the days, I was addicted to this" blah blah blah... Well the thing is, there is a reason why Past Tense is being used. Simply put it, the past is gone, and the key is to keep moving forward. Yes. The past is often the best prevention for future mistakes, & often the hardest thing to look past. And for good reason too. Cause our past is essentially what makes us.
Take for example, a full grown adult who turned into a criminal or prisoner is possibly due to a poor up-bringing, coming from a broken family, or just belong to an unfortunate case of the inability to catch up in a merito-CRAZY country.
A rich and successful happy individual had probably grown up in a happy family .. With good parents doing all they can to ensure their child grows and develops to a good person.
Of cause, its not going to be always the case as exceptions/outliers are bound to exist. Moreover, who am I to judge what is happy and what is successful anyway? That itself could spark a decade-long debate.
In the life of b3n ... 28 years of living has too its fair share of ups and downs.
Honestly (and this is indeed a bitter pill to swallow), I often am delusional.
A delusion is a belief held with strong conviction despite superior evidence to the contrary (Courtesy of the ever-reliable google search)
I always held a strong belief that I am always right. When sometimes it becomes very apparent that evidence is pointing to the contrary. Am I forever 21? No. Am I really a high flyer in real life? No. Am I at least a firm decision maker, expected of a 28 year old male? No.
But then, if someone were to come to me now and ask if I am a good decision maker, I'd say yes.
If someone were to come to me now and ask if I am going to be a high flyer, I'd again say yes.
Pride/Confident or.. plain Naive/Delusional..
That being said, I might become a good decision maker. I might become a high flyer. It is after-all something I can work towards. (Keyword here is MIGHT) & optimism must come back to me.. I still want it to be my USP.
Y2014 is coming.. And I must make a difference this year. Enough of excuses, enough of delusions. Enough of "Potential". If I had any potiential in me at all, this year is going to be the year I show it. Y2013 was a huge year for me... Having done things and experiencing things I've never thought I'd imagined. To others, traveling overseas with your girlfriend, or supporting your girlfriend in a public performance might be minor. In my life, such are the things which makes me feel like I have a purpose. I have someone special worth living and fighting for. Whatever struggles which needs to be faced, whatever fears that needs to be overcomed... Everyone needs a certain motivation to press on... To continue moving forward... And I must have done a million good deeds in my previous life to have found that motivation.
I am not going to make my new year resolutions for this year public, but the people around me probably knows what kind of resolutions I would make anyway.
To all who came by and read through this post of mine...
Have a happy new year! Cheers and may your life be blessed tgt with your loved ones.
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| You have no idea how much I love these moments together! |